one thing today

my oldest sis scored another birthday  talk about cut from the same cloth / 2 peas in 1 pod  she was my heaven then 

         ....  Hugo, Marcos, Larry, Paco, Jacob, Tony ...                                   like she wrote ...                                  when nothing                                           seems right                                           they b da best

... is possible to become addicted to power — particularly for certain character structures. Individuals with pronounced narcissistic, paranoid or psychopathic tendencies are especially vulnerable. For them, power does not merely enable action; it regulates inner states that would otherwise feel unmanageable. Donald Trump is an extreme illustration of this dynamic. From a psychoanalytic perspective, his narcissism is malignant in the sense that it is organized around a profound inner emptiness. Malignant narcissism is a combination of narcissism and psychopathology. Because there is little internal capacity for self-soothing or self-valuation, he requires continuous external affirmation to feel real and intact. Power supplies that affirmation. Visibility, dominance and constant stimulation temporarily fill the void.                                          ...

...  our human fate, and the reality of war and disease, it is crucial that we keep the idea of pleasure in circulation. We are desiring animals who arouse one another through speech and touch. Our pleasures support our activity and imagination. Play sustains our lightness and curiosity; it is itself a therapy. And so we must, until the end, insist on our appetites and delights.                                                                   Hanif Kureishi - Dispatches From My Hospital Bed  

I have been obsessed with Beverly di Angelo of late - she of horse riding in Central Park Hair fame,   Patsy Cline in Coal Miners Daughter  and and and ... mother of twins at 49 with Serpico and sexy super sexy voice. She bought the Dan Akroyd haunted house who bought it from Ringo Starr who bought it from Mama Cass. It was built for Natalie Wood. In her prime, Bev left show biz for a decade and married a young blond Italian comely count … who told her Pacino was a fantastic actor … so go be with him. Her kids are another example of beautiful people having surprisingly less than the same looking dazzling offspring … like Bruce and Demi. I feel a little mean writing this but just sayin'  and nobody cares and life’s relatively short and ultimately tragic so … so what.  

Ti me was not something then we thought of as an item that possessed an ending, but something that would go on forever, all rested and stopped in that moment.                                                                                                -Sebastian Barry