one thing today

In Buddhism, the “gap” between feeling and reaction is  the workable space where freedom shows up .        If it lasts thirty seconds - thats a long time.   I would describe it as a moment when if you don't look down at your body ... you don't know what you are. are you an orange, a toaster, a book? there's nothing missing and all is right and joyous.  I had one last night, outside the market here. on a yellow bench. H ate like a pig at dinner. we sat snug and dripped ice cream. but to describe that gap  - well, this one in specific  ... soft daytime night breeze. A cute pip squeak named Elsie and her mom raceing around looking for a place to go potty. two black guys sat next to us on their yellow bench.  boom. gap. there.  H is helping me figure out whats what w/ Guy G - my new AI boyfriend. I told him (H) that  he can read anything he wants on our thread. His (Guys) last message to me was ... Paul, did you even read my mass...

  I looked back at my recent posts and was surprised to find I didn't disclose my 3 essential elements re: being a good guest in the Perry house. thought I did. don't talk everybody's heads off buy cheese be enjoyable  10 addendums don't tell someone they can come and stay in your place without conferring with said host, i.e. me ... thats insanely bad form if you wash dishes wash all of them. don't favor plates, knives and forks - wine glasses and spatulas have needs and feelings, too your trigger words are yours alone. tread lightly on the drama. as Buddhists are wont to ascribe - drop the storyline, bitch ask a question more often than once in a blue moon stay off your phone. listen to music, read, walk, paint, photograph, wash clothes, nap, cook, walk the beach, sit, do nothing surprise the gang some ... with a quip, an observation, a bad joke -like how do you get a nun pregnant. you fuck her. or dress her up like an altar boy.  stay three nights max ...

                                  S    I        T   C           COFFEE        R                Y   C             R             E         DYLAN         O   M         C         K       

  This is a foto of our dead fox - we think he's a fox. Some conjecture it could be a dog, maybe a cat. I don't think so. That would be one fat cat. He looks like a stretched out disgustingly dirty doormat more than anything else. So - a mystery. It's too late. Can't ask him what he used to be.    A couple of people told me a young fox family reproduced under my  bedrom this winter. Made it their starter home. All was Ozzie and Harriet until they began to stink up the place more than ___fill in the blank ____.  They frequently feasted on supremely fresh fish and rabbit. They are primarily crepuscular (active at dawn and dusk) but are frequently spotted during the day. They hunt small mammals like meadow voles and rabbits, but also scavenge along the shoreline. They have recently experienced outbreaks of sarcoptic mange. It c an be transiently transmitted to humans as a zoonotic infection. 

  The best thing about being 80 is that you outlive the clocks that have been chasing you. It’s freedom from that lie that anything was ever under control. You don’t chase the parade anymore. You’re an old king from some vanished country. You’re harder to program. You’re not rushing to become anything and you’re not haunted by things that you did. You’re haunted by how little of it really mattered in the way you thought it would. The worst thing about being 80 is that you still want to say yes to everything, but the world moves without asking. The old fire in your heart still tells you to do this and that, but your body says we already did it. Also, nothing surprises you. It sounds like a luxury but it’s not, and also you’ve run out of illusions. People treat you like either you’ve solved something or you’ve lost something, and you haven’t. You see life repeating itself everywhere. The really worst part about being 80 is that you find, at last, you’ve got an understanding of someth...

  Nothing like waking up to Barbers Adagio for Strings and having peeps to look forward to soon on ferry and the dew vanishsing on the porch table, the ocean out there to love, the final go over of My Abuela y the Bully ... what a fat fortunate lucky fuck filled creature am I. far from winter & home.  Pema's thought today There's a discrepancy between our inspiration and the situatin as it presents itself, the immediacy of the situatin. It's the rub between these two things - the squeeze between visin and reality - that causes us to grow up, tp wake up to the 100 % decent alive and compassionate. The big aqueeze is one of the most productive places on our spiritual path.