one thing today

  Jealousy … dictionary.com resentment against a rival, a person enjoying success or advantage, etc., or against another's success or advantage itself. mental uneasiness from suspicion or fear of rivalry,   unfaithfulness, etc., as in love or aims. A zillion years ago - my main squeeze who once in a while was a true blue smarty on point pants told me jealousy is ...   one person thinking the other person is having a better time.

Gave directions to the Highline Gave tourists direction to the closest liquor store   Made a buddy laugh Made overdue amends with a lifetime friend  

I watched The Eyes of Laura Mars - 1 978, Faye Dunaway, Tommy Lee Jones … she’s a fashion photographer … Columbus Circle, cars on fire, models in lingerie pulling each others hair, traffic, crowds, the city at its roiling roaringest. I was working at Thirteen on the corner - saw it all out our window, along with my work buddies. I knew I was at the right place at the right time and I was gonna make the most of it and I did.  

I spot a white parsons desk on the street. It’s spotless and firm.   I go home and get a tape measure and find it fits like a glove in my foyer, replacing a makeshift table. I begin to walk it home.  It’s heavy and makes me realize how not strong I am anymore. A very handsome young couple - he’s from Portugal, she’s from Serbia, ask me if I need help. I say no at first - even though it’s obvious I do. They move the table into my apartment with me.   I tell them how lovely and kind they are and I wish they had stayed for a while for coffee or tips on what to do in the city. I tell them I'll pay it forward. Restored my faith in how wonderful some/most people are.   I didn’t want them to leave.   I go out for coffee this morning. Seven year old next door neighbor Felix says I haven’t left him any gifts lately. I tell him I’ll see what I can do. I ask a guy on the street who asked for a dollar if   he needed a warm coat.   He says oh, man, yes. I give him two, one super warm, the kind

watching Dancing with the Stars and one couple did a Quick Step routine and it brought me back to when my mom and dad danced it in front of a lit up fireplace in our living room when I was a kid.  Their elegant skill surprised me. I loved how in tune and touch they were. If I recall right, my reaction was somewhat reserved for some reason.  I wish I had showed them how much I loved it. 

  I'm watching Alone Australia on the History Channel ... 10 survivalist types compete to see who will last the longest in the wild. no camermen. they are given equipment and some thing to help them light fires. one of them hears a tasmanian devil in the middle of the night. they can make sawdust out of bone. once in college we tripped and went to the cincinatti zoo and encountered the creatures.  they were the scariest animals I ever saw.  I couldn't tell if it was the acid or reality.  In retrospect, I think it was the real deal. 

 

  Having two black friends is better than having cable these days.

 

  … countered it with a 13K walk, listening to a sax and a drummer play Chaka K in Union Square and standing room only in Washington Square. things seem better when people seem more tender than not.